Finding My Voice

When I started this blog back in October I thought I had a clear idea of what I wanted it to be.

I am now rethinking that clarity.

After an initial burst of posts about my own cardiac event and subsequent posts about other guy’s heart attack stories I began to run out of steam. To anyone who has been following this blog that is pretty obvious. My last post was almost a month ago when I graduated from cardiac rehab.

In a way that was a turning point for me. Once I had completed the rehabilitation I actually felt like my old self again. I am back running at a pace that is pretty darn close to my pre heart attack pace and I am seriously considering entering a 10K race this April.

That is not to say that I feel like I am cured. I realize that this would be pure folly. You don’t “cure” heart disease; you simply learn how to live with it.

I am learning how to live with it. I am much more cognizant of what I eat and drink and I no longer consider exercise to be an optional activity. I am growing comfortable with these changes too. Oh sure, I still miss the buzz of three cups of black, caffeine infused coffee. Decaf just doesn’t give me the same thrill. On the other hand, I really don’t miss fried food and I have found that I enjoy eating heart healthy. It actually makes me feel better!

Don’t get me wrong though. I am still no saint. I still enjoy drinking more than a couple glasses of wine and I have no intention of giving up steak. It is just that now I savor those indulgences a bit more. If I am going to have some wine it is going to be GOOD wine. The same goes for steak. If I am going to have a steak is going to be USDA Prime.

The bottom line is that I have adjusted to my new life with heart disease. I understand that there is a very real possibility that, no matter what preventive measures I take, I will have another heart attack at some point in my life. I have simply decided to accept my fate and get on with life.

So what about this blog then?

I have been told that depression is pretty common amongst people who have had a heart attack. A buddy of mine recently told me that depression is more prevalent in heart attack survivors than in cancer survivors.

Fortunately that has not been the case with me. I have a rather enlightened view of my new heart reality. I like poking fun at myself and being a little irreverent at times. Perhaps that is my own personal coping mechanism. Perhaps that is something that may help others in dealing with their own reality of life with heart disease.
So I guess I’ll continue here, sharing things I find that may be of interest about life with heart disease. In my mind this is kind of like a heart attack club but you don’t necessarily have to have had one to join.